Before She Beats (parody Of Before He Cheats) by Mark Spencer

Right now she's probably spying
on me, thinking I came here,
With a frisky little Sheila...
right now, she probably
thinks I’m planning
to undress some girl with
a bottle of tequila...

Right now, she's in the
parking lot with a
hunting knife and her
Brother’s favorite long bow...

But she don't know...

That today I let her Daddy buy
my pretty little souped up
4 wheel drive,
She’s out there carving up
his leather seats...
She’ll take a Louisville slugger
to both headlights,
slash a hole in all his tires...

Maybe next time she'll think
before she beats.

Right now, her daddy’s up singing
some nightmare version of
Merle Haggard karaoke..
Right now, I’d really hate to be her
When he gets done butchering
Okie From Muskogee
Right now, I’ll capture this moment
on a 4 mega pixel cell phone photo…
‘Cause she don't know...

That today I let her Daddy buy
my pretty little souped up
4 wheel drive,
She’s out there carving up
his leather seats...
She took a Louisville slugger
to both headlights,
slashed a hole in all his tires...

Maybe next time she'll think
before she beats.

I might've made a little
trouble for the next guy,
Cause the next time that she beats...

Oh…you know it won't be on me!

Ohh...not on me...

‘Cause once I let her Daddy buy
my pretty little souped up
4 wheel drive,
He caught her carving up
his leather seats...
He grabbed that Louisville slugger
And took a swat,
Then chased her through the parking lot...

Maybe next time she'll think
before she beats.

Ohh.. Maybe next time she'll think
before she beats...

Ohh... before she beats...

shiloh (66.24.112.118) -- Wednesday, September 12 2007, 01:23 am

well done!
greatly enjoyed the visual of this poem!

Russ (172.193.168.93) -- Thursday, September 20 2007, 01:34 am

It's about time!!!
It's about time that somebody rewrote that damn song! This is great!

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