Painfully I Set You Free by Terrie*

if I could hold your hand, just one more time
embrace your soul, caress your mind
caress your soul,embrace your mind
wrap my loving arms around you for the last time
I'd know how to set you free
I might be able to open my heart and let you go
or perhaps stop thinking of myself, just for one day
in my mind I place you by my side
you make me feel safe and secure
I may not find that anywhere else
I feel like this is taking too long
I have held on tightly for the past two hours
I still have so much love to share with you
it has been tough keeping it inside
I might explode
darling,please open your eyes. i love you

Dear God
come to my aide,place your hand on mine
touch my soul,let me know
caress my mind tell me he will be fine
let him wrap his arms around me
even if it is for the last time,
open the cage I keep myself in
I know to hold love loosly...
for it to come back, i know he may not...

darling i have sadly watched as they put all those gadgets on you
with no guarantee that you will survive
I felt so helpless and weak
I kept myself from falling to the floor for our childrens sake,when they carried you away in the ambulance
the poor darlings didn't know what to think
I was concerned when you didn't return to bed
the worst fear that we could ever imagine
was when we found you laying motionless on the kitchen floor
our 11 year olds quick response got us thru to 911
we administered what she was told
until the fire department & paramedics made it to you

I remember you waited seven years for me
you touched my heart you touched my soul
your love illuminated and glowed
the first love that I ever have known
how could I forget that first touch
all my experiences with you were my first
today I await for the results of that surgery
a 50/50 that had you and I in a loop
I do not want to loose you my love
I just want to take you home
and take care of you
I remember the last words that you said
burned a hole in my soul
before you were taken away
you told me you loved me
and that those were the best 13 years of your life
and I replied: well sweetheart same goes for me
your not getting out of it ,
because your stuck with me for 13 + more...
at the end, they allowed me to hold
you even though you were already gone...
I got my answer from God to let you go
a question that runs thru my mind
and keeps me puzzled
one that I or no one has been able to answer
why is it that i can not let go of something that does not exist anymore?
from your end I know you will watch over us
I am glad God sent you to me to share a glorious life with
what you and I had was so real
something that our hearts were able to feel
I still sleep w/that old shirt of yours
the one you wore when they carried you away
the smell of the cologne makes your presence so intense
as I have read other poems to you I know you understood and were able to hear
by the way that your hand squeezed mine
and I hope you can still hear as I finish reading this one to you
when you waited for me ...
you did a lot for me during our time as one
I will never forget how to love because of you
as much as it hurts I have set you free..
i love you.....
the pain is deep down in my soul
but i know you will be waiting for me..

MC (152.163.100.5) -- Saturday, May 27 2006, 08:30 pm

This kind of love
never, NEVER dies. You have been blessed beyond measure to have had this love for any amount of time. Some people search all their lives for just a taste of something this pure and sweet, and never find it. God Bless you, always.

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