Week 14

This is a category for playing around with our talents for writing

Postby Dreamer » Mon Sep 15, 2003 2:23 am

The Coming Of Night

Pine trees paint water color sunsets
dipped it shades of red & yellow
sweeping across the sky with each breath of wind
With an artists eye, breathtaking splendor

Reflections pool in the lake water
disturbed only by a passing fish
Unfocused mirror refracted
as the colors disperse, blurring light

The horizon becomes unrecognized
Gently evolving to night
stars winking in the twilight
as they kiss the sunlight goodbye

The shift to darkness now prevails
Crickets and frogs sing in cadence
to the diamonds that dot the sky
The peacefulness of it all fills my heart
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Postby bench » Mon Sep 15, 2003 8:20 pm

I've posted this too. Hope I'm not yet late.

DANCE OF THE DEAD

The only light that night
Came from the full moon
Shining down on writhing bodies
As they performed the dance of the dead.

And one created a fire, full of pasion
In the middle of the the squirming throng
The sweaty bodies pulsating to the tune
Of cymbals and drums.

Foot on foot, hand on hand
Torsos swaying, humping,jumping
The eyes rolled up in ecstasy
Oblivious to the world around.

The beat quickens and everyone joins in
The performers now moan and wail
Dancing to the beat, the fire rose up in all splendor
And consumed all their dreams.

Soulless eyes stare into space
As the music dies down
The dead will now peacefully
Lie in their cold chambers.
Live Life, Love Life
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Postby RinRin » Tue Sep 16, 2003 4:12 pm

this is really hard...i liked each and every one! but i think i'm going to go with...Luc's! i liked the way he described the girl's fear, and her whole experience running from something that frightened her. There could be so many interpretations to this poem...but the detail was very nice, and from beginning to end I could see the entire thing happening before me. Brenda's also had that potential, and also everyone else's! i wish I could just choose all of you..hehe..well congrats, luc, and come up with a good topic for us :D

*RinRin*
I left a flower on the doorstep, a weed that still remembers me.
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Postby Martin Vann » Tue Sep 16, 2003 5:40 pm

RinRin,

I agree with your choice, all entries were excellent, I guess it's a guy thing, I couldn't help but want to help that little girl, the whole adventure seemed to be so real!


Hey, Luc;

You are now, cannon fodder, produce! Else we will dress you little girl's clothing and send into the Forest, all-by-yourself!

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Postby Luc » Tue Sep 16, 2003 7:38 pm

lol.. thanks.. didnt really want to win because i knew the winner has to come up with a topic, and well.. i just suck at it and feel i'll just kill the whole rythme.. but, thats just one more challenge im willing to meet.. um yeah that sounded all cheesy but true.. ha. umm..

thanks a bunch, and glad everyone liked it. on to week 15!
"The error of youth is to believe that intelligence is a substitute for experience, while the error of age is to believe experience is a substitute for intelligence." - Lyman Bryson
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Postby Everett&Brenda » Tue Sep 16, 2003 7:44 pm

congrats luc
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