Memories are all I really have left.
Anything real, has died away.

They were all of me watching you leave.
Crying out to you, to God, to fate.

Reaching for you.
Don’t leave… Please God, not again.

I treated you with such care.
I gave everything I had to you.

I didn’t do anything to deserve this….
Did I?

Did I?
I did.

Today I saw myself through your eyes.
All the cobwebs cleared.

The memories I had were only the ones I wanted.
Not the ones we made.

I held on to you too tightly.
And like trying to squeeze sand…

The tighter I held you,
The more you slipped away.

I was as imperfect as my memory.
To keep you close, I pushed you away.

I’m so sorry.
I just… just loved you.

No one knows me like you.
No one holds my heart like you.

You know everything about me.
Even the things that I still cry about, to this day.

And I know everything about you.
Every fear, joy, and dream…memorized.
I know the things that pain you.
The pains that you have told no one else about.

You know how I need to be alone, when I’m upset.
I know how you need to be held when you are scared.

You know how my left eyebrow raises when I am sarcastic.
I know how your nose crinkles when you smile.

You know how to make me laugh.
I know how to make you blush.

You know how to break my heart
And, unfortunately, I know how to make you cry.

You were there for me when my world came down around me.
I was there for you when your body failed you.

I know your imperfections.
You know mine.

But despite these things.
We love each other.

We share something more precious than gold.
We share time.

Something that is spent too freely,
And never recovered.

I hate the pain I have felt over you.
And I hate myself for the pain that I have caused you.

It wasn’t always perfect,
But it was always…us

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