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Celestial Spectator
Author: Capricorn

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Intent, I witness you amassed to pay
your last respects, reciting snips of script
like actors from an ill-remembered play
performed in yesteryear. I listen, gripped
as timbres swell from anthems that I sang,
before my mind declined as I grew old.
I ponder our long friendship with a pang
of sadness. When I longed to feel consoled
by company, I watched you pass my door
to pray for me in church and ached to hear
your voices -- laughter lifting me once more.
Alone, I felt at sea, submerged in fear.
Religiously you mouthed my name in prayer;
you’ve left it late to show how much you care.

------- Author's Notes -------

This is something I had to get off my chest. Mum had been a member of her Church for 50 years, but when she became ill with Alzheimer's she had hardly any visitors and became very lonely ~ yet they all came to her funeral.

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Comments on this poem/writing:

Taylor James (194.81.223.62) -- Tuesday, June 20 2006, 12:47 pm

..

hey capricorn, i know how it feels when someone gets ill and then there friends dnt bother to go and see them. great poem
Capricorn (82.36.128.180) -- Tuesday, June 20 2006, 03:05 pm

thanks

I appreciate your comment and I see you know what I mean.
barb (67.58.207.54) -- Tuesday, June 20 2006, 03:34 pm

know what you mean

yea the saying Times get tough the tough get going.So do all the so-called friends lol they go away. wierd good expression of how you hurt for your Mum.
MC (64.12.116.5) -- Tuesday, June 20 2006, 07:28 pm

So sad, but true...

that people you consider friends, ignore your needs when you need them the most. Death and dying make people so uncomfortable. It is a truly good person, who sits with, and cares for, the terminally ill. I'm sorry for your loss.
barb (67.58.207.54) -- Tuesday, June 20 2006, 09:19 pm

on your time cap sorry

I have to say male or female it doesn't matter, you are a kind intuitive person.MC and I'm sure Capricirn would agree.
Capricorn (82.36.128.180) -- Wednesday, June 21 2006, 08:12 am

MC

thank you for your kind words and understanding
capricorn (82.36.128.180) -- Wednesday, June 21 2006, 08:15 am

Barb

Thanks Barb ~ I got it off my chest. Perhaps I expect too much from 'church people', but even the pastor rarely visited her, whereas he used to visit regularly before she became ill.
barb (67.58.206.244) -- Wednesday, June 21 2006, 04:09 pm

human kindness

you just thought your mom deserved human decentcy
from these people.That 's not expecting too much. I don't think.:)))))))
Meridian (71.253.219.127) -- Saturday, June 24 2006, 06:10 pm

I can only imagine

The grief and hurt felt by you for the loss of loved one. However, I understand completely when you mention in so many words how backwards it is when some friends distance themselves until their friend has passed on. It's like asking, "where were you when she was sick?"

Nicely done. Sorry about your loss though Cap.
Capricorn (82.46.210.240) -- Monday, June 26 2006, 09:43 am

Thanks

I'm glad you understand what I mean ... I still feel very hurt because although Mum had alzheimer's she was at one time very aware that people were not coming to see her. When I asked the Pastor why her friends didn't come to see her he said " people live busy lives" -- yet they passed her house to go to church and the shops. Even the pastor stopped calling often. I believe they will have to answer to God for that neglect.
barb (67.58.205.114) -- Monday, June 26 2006, 02:53 pm

your writing shares the hurt and anger

There's a saying cap "So busy with things. Life passed me by." that's what they did so busy in their own life that real life passed them.good write showing what's important.
Capricorn (82.46.210.240) -- Monday, June 26 2006, 11:48 pm

Thanks

Thanks Barb ~ I know you understand
John F (81.101.29.91) -- Saturday, July 8 2006, 12:32 pm

How sad

It is good to get some things into the open. I applaud you for your sincere honesty and send my condolences.
capricorn (82.46.180.69) -- Tuesday, July 11 2006, 01:04 am

Thank you

Yes ~ I do feel better for getting this off my chest John. Thank you for your kind thoughts.
 
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