vinebar

A Journey Through A Hell Of My Own Making
15 July, 2009
Author: Shiloh

vinebar

the dreams i seek are yet to come,
the paths and trails are difficult,
and deep the valleys i must cross,
but ever forward i've endured,-
to what end i do not know...

'tis only hope and yearning that drives me on,
my quest for that which i cannot name,
for fear of seeing it for what it surely is -
folly, loss, turmoil and punishment,
for something that i know is simply

a thing i will not repair,
a thing i will not correct,
a thing i will not embrace,
a thing i will not win,
a thing i will not prevail in...

the advantage is not mine,
but i play the fool so well,
never seeing the end, so apparent,
but ignored in desperation,
because I am blinded by my need...

... it is seldom that the chance comes 'round
more than once in the time spent wandering,
and sadly it is seldom that the chance pays off
with that jackpot of all prizes -
so the prize unheld finally dies... finally dies.

there will never be an end, i fear,
unless i waken from my dream,
and see the search for what it is -
that which i don't want to accept,
because it is so hard to lay it down and walk away...

there are dreamers of dreams and fears,
and singers of songs and ballads,
and writers and poets and philosophers,
and great minds who have expressed such things...
and now I understand I must accept their wisdom...

...and reluctantly, put it all to rest.

vinebar

Comments on this poem/writing:

Tony (71.162.200.66) -- Tuesday, July 31 2012, 06:22 pm

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Shiloh, Your poem is truly speaks of an emptiness so difficult to put into words. I would like to share this with my class as tribute to our heritage.
 
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