I tried to do what I thought was right;
I didn't tell my kids how to think,
but I did tell them how I thought,
and why.
I wanted them to make their own decisions,
their own mistakes,
And learn from them, individually.
I didn't want to stand over them
and supervise their whole lives.
I didn't want to be a parent
who said, "I told you so."

And now,
Instead of having the three sons
I started out with,
I have just two sons,
Because one of them
made his own decision to disown us.
If there�'s another word for it,
I don't care.
It still means the same.
It still hurts the same.
And I would still have trouble not crying,
Trouble getting to sleep at night,
Trouble with holidays
And family gatherings,
No matter what it was called.

I call it an ungodly hurt.

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