I lay wide awake
In my bed in the darkness of my room
It engulfs me like fog in the early morning

Counting sheep doesn't help
My mind is stuck on a giant wheel
that won't stop spinning

I'm like a poor deer stuck in headlights
I must face the truth
to not let myself get run over by the lies
face my worries
face it all

I wrestle my thoughts
and pin them to the floor
Going over them with care
Turning them this way and that
I'm a detective looking for clues
to unlock my mind and heart

I think about the good times
the bad and the funny
I relive school:
the conversations, the gossip
and you

I think a lot about you
I debate inside my mind
Countering myself back and forth
I'm on an endless merry - go - round
Condemned to it for eternity

Thinking is such an easy task
Answering questions that don't have
true answers is not easy or fun

Should I do this?
Should I do that?
I question myself time and time again
Do you even deserve me?
Do I even deserve you?
I whisper to no one in the darkness

Sleep: my only true friend
is late to night
He left me with reality
with my life

I want the dreams and fantasies
I so adorn

When will he come
to take me away?
He is the one man I truly trust
With my heart and my soul

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Copyright©2017-1999 by Rebecca R. Hammack

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