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Heaven's Cascade -5
1 March, 2003
Author: Seizure

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Just when you think you know, the reasons for your strife
You're before a jury, that judges your life
Judgment has been passed, I'm to fall to Hell
Where I'm to be tortured, none can hear me yell
The ground beneath me shakes, I look up at my guide
He said entrance to Heaven, was simply denied
I'm to serve the flame, I'm to be a sheep
But just a forwarning, never fall asleep
That's when demons can, rip apart your soul
He can't help me now, in Hell he has no control

The ground beneath me cracks, the angels laugh above
Where was their compassion? Where was their love?
The ground breaks away, I start to descend
In the world of angels, I didn't have a friend
Not even Heaven, wants me to be there
The laughing stops as, I tumble through the air
I'm out of control, the world spins around
Will it hurt when I land, slamming on the ground?
Where is my guide now? Is he laughing too?
I can't believe this, I can't believe it's true

I've fallen for days, it's a long way down
I've been discarded, I feel like a clown
There's nothing I can do, my life is not my own
It is something I, always should have known
Well it's too late now, I never believed
I'm the cosmic joke, I am so deceived
I finally hit the ground, it did not hurt that much
But the flames around me, burn with every touch
I look up to Heaven, I can see them all
Enough drop to form, a glowing waterfall

------- Author's Notes -------

This is the follow up to Drivel
The story continues next poem

"S"

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Comments on this poem/writing:

Seizure (216.47.215.144) -- Monday, March 3 2003, 06:51 am

BOOOO!!!

And to think this is the best I could do. Looks like I need to take a little break from my 20 poem story and see if I still know how to write a damn poem.

You can't even decipher the last two lines!!! It's supposed to visualize that so many souls fall from heaven, it appears to be a glowing waterfall... but i couldn't even do that... BOOO!!!
barb (206.191.91.93) -- Monday, March 3 2003, 05:01 pm

I think it's good

Seisure stop thinking the worse, your writing is good that's your talent that was given you. some people are in awe of people that can put words together to form feelings. very good seisure.
Martin Vann (67.75.178.192) -- Tuesday, March 4 2003, 12:37 am

Even when...,

Seis,
Even when you can't get your "Boo together," most of it makes sense, Remember, don't sweat the small s....uff.
We read and understand. Take a break, have a cup of Java.

Another one of your many admirers,

P.S. Hey, if we all had your wordish ability, we would be tired to! Not even Hell OR heaven, wants you to be where only YOU think you are. You are a ta-rif-ic (can't spell the other word) so, write what you feel, we read, we believe in you. You are the slap in the face, our wake up call from hell! You are good, Seiz, I can't help but do a little dance of my own when I read your poems.

MartinV
Seizure (216.47.215.144) -- Tuesday, March 4 2003, 02:04 am

Well...

Thanks for the words of encouragement Barb and Martin. Always appreciated... but I definately took a breather from the 20 poem story and sent in three "off topic" ones last night. I think that's what I needed... a breather...
LinzAy (64.12.96.167) -- Wednesday, March 5 2003, 01:39 am

......

I can see how the last two lines could be confusing...but all in all Seiz, it's an awesome poem! Can't wait to read "S".
Seizure (216.47.215.144) -- Wednesday, March 5 2003, 06:02 am

LinzAy...

The letters found at the base of each poem in the story is not the title of the next one. Once all 20 drop, you will see the title for the story. It all spells out something.
Meridian (205.188.209.103) -- Friday, March 12 2004, 03:55 am

Good Poetry Writer You Are Seizure

Seizure, I read the poem. What you think is bad, is really good! Inspite of the changes you wanted to make with it, it still stands out and is very good!

LET's HeAr it for................Give me a
S-E-I-Z-U-R-E
Hooray! Good job!
heaven (68.43.99.209) -- Monday, March 22 2004, 03:20 am

i like it!!!

ur a really good writter!!r u published yet?if not u should be!!!i love how u write!!
 
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