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Entangled -1
Author: Seizure

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As darkness surrounds me, I start to realize
That I took my own life, but still no one cries
As my life escapes, I lay on the floor
I had breath in my lungs, just not anymore
I start to feel scared, am I finally dead?
I can see the weapon, that hollowed out my head
No I am not dreaming, what is to become
Of me while I lay here, I'm already numb

Days begin to pass, still I am aware
Trapped inside my body, still no one's out there
No one really cared, I really was alone
I have told no one, they could not have known
What I planned to do, and finally carried out
Frustration builds inside me, but still I can not shout
When will someone find me? Who will set me free?
Weeks begin to pass, I think I've counted three

As I lay here longer, insects eat my skin
I can't brush them off, now they are within
Eating my insides, I start to decompose
Out of all my options, this is what I chose
Yeah look at me now, I have gone astray
I hate myself more, as I just decay
Broken and forgotten, a sight to behold
Nothing left to do but, watch my fate unfold

------- Author's Notes -------

This poem is the follow up to, "Perfect Place."
The story continues, next poem.

"T"

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Comments on this poem/writing:

Megan (152.163.195.186) -- Monday, February 10 2003, 03:29 pm


I always like your poems, this one was awesome too.
Martin Vann (63.208.62.168) -- Monday, February 10 2003, 11:46 pm

The message that I hear is..,

We spend so much time thinking of our self, hell, there is no time for someone else. As close as we may think we are, Hell, I can only think of me! So, its been good knowing you, have a nice trip. With such feelings as the controling device of our lives, we never hear the calls for help, from those we call our friends, yet, spit them from our lives. Hey they died, we will to, why react like its some kind of surprise?

Seizure, you have a tremendously, effective manner in your work (truth) which I believe, should open up our dead eyes. Its you that see, and we, who are blind. We hear no cries, see no tears, my "life is fine," sorry that my best friend died! Time to see what good movies are on cable, hope I remember to send some flowers to oh, who was it that just died?

Seizure, this is so, sadly true!!!!!

MartinV

P.S. Seiz, you don't write, you crucify, may the cross be with, but never find you! Never heard the word F once in this work, I agree, you didn't need it for if you did, it would have been there in Caps.
luc (68.74.117.218) -- Tuesday, February 11 2003, 01:15 am


o.O is it just me or is your work on perposely rymying. sounds kinda nice. heh. i like your poems seizure and i cant wait for more. to bad i have to wait a week :( oh well building up suspence huh... you devil you .. lol :P nice work.
luc (68.74.117.218) -- Tuesday, February 11 2003, 01:17 am

typo

in stead of work i ment to put comment. and the first sentence was aimed at martin v.
Seizure (68.154.39.55) -- Tuesday, February 11 2003, 12:33 pm

profound statement

I'm glad you guys all enjoyed it. This is just the introduction to my "profound statement" that will be concluded by poem 20. But no, I'm not really trying to create suspense... I'm just trying to make sure each poem from the set get's it's chance to be heard as they all build off each other. If someone skips one, then they won't understand the message being portrayed at the end.
2 Luc (67.28.94.109) -- Tuesday, February 11 2003, 03:05 pm

Why do my replies seem to ryhme...,

Luc, I don't really know why, they just come out that way. That is, most of the time. I think, it may be that if, I like something I have read, then I get into it and reply in rhyme, that is just my way. Perhaps its my way of giving something back to the author, showing that in "my way," I enjoyed every line and got something out of it.

MartinV
barb (216.129.37.250) -- Wednesday, February 12 2003, 04:15 pm

cremation

good writing seizure, that's why I want to be cremated I hate the thoughts of creepy crawlies all over me inside and out Hha ha keep writing.
Seizure (65.164.72.2) -- Friday, February 14 2003, 04:04 pm

barb

Wanna know what happens during cremation? :). I won't get into it, no sense in grossing you out there :).
LinzAy (64.12.102.54) -- Monday, February 17 2003, 07:02 am

......

O wow! I cant believe i didnt see this..although i havent really had the time to raed too many poems :(
I must say Seiz....i like i like!!! awesome writing!! Wow...i dont think i could do a thing with connecting poems....but yea...awesome work!
Seizure (216.47.215.144) -- Friday, February 28 2003, 05:02 pm

great

I'm really glad you enjoyed it LinzAy. Sorry it took so long for me to get back with you, but I've been real busy lately... much like you not beling able to read many poems as of late. I feel most people have no further interest in my story, but I don't care... it's my story and I'm going to tell it all the way through.
Leah (12.232.5.189) -- Wednesday, March 12 2003, 01:57 am

no title

This poem was really good. I really enjoy your work. In case you were ever once wondering if anyone ever felt the same way, i wanted to tell you that i do. This poem really touched me because i feel that way some times and it feels exactly like the way you described it. I know i am not the only one because my friends (being teens) look for me for advice and they feel the same way. Anyways Good Job!
 
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