Pendulum's Second Swing
A girl went out with friends, her boyfriend was at home
He tried to go call her, but she left her phone
He's losing his patience, she is having fun
Time for her to be home, it is half past one
He sat down in his chair, and turned on TV
He saw what he wanted, shipping's even free
He could not believe it, after all these years
What he always wanted, it made his eyes leak tears
Now his program's over, but she's still not there
It's like she knows he's waiting, it's like she doesn't care
She just stepped inside, then turned and closed the door
Her boyfriend came behind her, and yelled, "You fucking whore!"
He just started swinging, regardless where it'd hit
He then grabbed her neck, and said, "You piece of shit"
"You are gonna die," then squeezed her neck so tight
She was far too weak, to try and even fight
Now she is deceased, he hid her in his room
He could see her ring, that'd make him her groom
But he didn't care, he knew he was right
I mean she had to cheat, why else be gone all night?
He suspected this, for quite a long time
It just must be true, she was the one in crime
Just then the phone rang, so he picked it up
But all that he heard, made him drop his cup
Turns out she wasn't cheating, she was at the store
She was never like that, she was not a whore
Money never mattered, she loved him anyway
Even though he doubted, every single day
He knew what he did, as he saw her dead
So he grabbed a gun, and hollowed out his head
Comments on this poem/writing:
|Pamela (220.127.116.11) -- Tuesday, September 10 2002, 03:06 am|
This poem is extremely disturbing to me - it shows the primitive nature of humans to suspect that something is wrong for no reason at all. It shows the beastiality we have towards one another when it comes to possessive tendencies and addiction to control one another ALL the time. Very disturbing because it happens every day.
|Seizure (18.104.22.168) -- Tuesday, September 10 2002, 03:25 am|
Well, yes, that was the intention of the work there. I don't know if you realize it or not.. but the point of the Pendulum poems I write is "cause and effect." The first one with the rich guy ignoring the homeless man... then one day becomes homeless and needs the help of the homeless man.
This one is about a man's jealousy and he realizes his fault only after it's too late. She was at the store buying that item he always wanted that he saw on TV but for some reason I didn't feel like making that more specific in the poem. It's just to show his jealousy really killed them both.
Anyway... hope you enjoyed it even though it was "disturbing."
|Luc (22.214.171.124) -- Wednesday, September 11 2002, 02:25 am|
well yeah i do agree it was kinda disturbing but either way good. it is scary that , that kinda shit happens almost every damnable night, but hey got to face the truth cant hind from it.
|Pamela (126.96.36.199) -- Thursday, September 12 2002, 12:15 am|
I sure didn't mean to sound so serious in that comment! But it was disturbing, but it was good. Your poems are always disturbing but good. Thats why I like them.
|Seizure (188.8.131.52) -- Thursday, September 12 2002, 10:30 pm|
Luc, thanks for the comment. Glad you see how it's supposed to be.
Pamela, glad to see i misunderstood :).
|mental (184.108.40.206) -- Friday, September 13 2002, 02:08 am|
a very trancing story. you did,nt want to stop reading even though you had some inkling what was going to happen, but i wanted to see how you would word it and word it you did, excellent
|Sax (220.127.116.11) -- Saturday, September 21 2002, 04:56 am|
I really hate that feeling, and that poem to me is like a personification of it.... God damn I REALLY fearing hate that feeling, thinking the other person is cheating on you or dosnt want you around when it's indeed the exact opposite, they dont cheat on there other and they'd like you to be around.
|babygurl (18.104.22.168) -- Saturday, October 19 2002, 12:59 am|
This poem was very good....all your poems are. It teaches people that you can't assume things cuz if you do you could be wrong, and then it's to late. Keep up the good work!
|babygurl (22.214.171.124) -- Saturday, October 19 2002, 01:02 am|
waing for Pendulum's Third Swing
|Seizure (126.96.36.199) -- Saturday, October 19 2002, 06:48 am|
The next Pendulum is actually called, "Pendulum Closure." It's the last planned one about a judge. I don't know when i'll submit it.. i'll have to find it first.
|smiley (188.8.131.52) -- Monday, October 21 2002, 09:45 pm|
I'll read every one of your's
|J. (184.108.40.206) -- Tuesday, October 22 2002, 01:00 am|
um... its weird but the part where he was beating the chick made me laugh... maybe its because i know you... hmm...:) dammit...
|J. (220.127.116.11) -- Tuesday, October 22 2002, 01:02 am|
...you know... do these people know this is a song?
|barb (18.104.22.168) -- Wednesday, October 23 2002, 12:16 am|
I was one of the chicks that was assalted didn't think it was something to laugh about
|Seizure (22.214.171.124) -- Wednesday, October 23 2002, 06:19 am|
I have an idea, stop commenting on my work Jake. You are misinterpreting what I'm trying to portray here and offending people in the process. This is something I take very seriously and have been at it for much longer than a year. I don't need you to come in here and do stupid comments like that anymore.
It would be appreciated. We are really good friends, so respect that.
|barb (126.96.36.199) -- Wednesday, October 23 2002, 01:13 pm|
I read your comment to J. thank-you for understanding
your enemy #1 Barb.Haaa
|Seizure (188.8.131.52) -- Wednesday, October 23 2002, 08:23 pm|
We never were enemies. I've forgiven you on that whole past issue. I suppose I didn't make that clear earlier :). But yeah, it's all good between us now.
|barb (184.108.40.206) -- Wednesday, October 23 2002, 09:59 pm|
I'm glad everythings fine now. I had a big mouth. notice I said Had.. Still do oh well. no harm meant.
|Tiffany (220.127.116.11) -- Wednesday, October 23 2002, 10:18 pm|
I deffinitly agree with smily i have to read all of your poems. this one was i don't just wow, so breath taking, and suspence in every way. i still can't get over the fact on what he did. Great write.
|J. (18.104.22.168) -- Thursday, October 24 2002, 03:42 am|
enemy #1 am I? hmm...
|J. (22.214.171.124) -- Thursday, October 24 2002, 03:50 am|
um... nm that eariler comment:) and to chicky who was offended... um... i know im an insensitive bastard but its all good... it just struck me as funny:)...
|barb (126.96.36.199) -- Thursday, October 24 2002, 02:09 pm|
by the way I'm not a chicky my name is BARB
|J. (188.8.131.52) -- Friday, October 25 2002, 05:18 am|
so... you're not a chicky eh? didn't know guys were named barb these days... hmm... j/k...
|barb (184.108.40.206) -- Friday, October 25 2002, 02:25 pm|
I'm just going to ignore you, can't be bothered answering you. you'd never understand what's being said anyways. you think you're being funny but you are really being obnoxious.
|Leah (220.127.116.11) -- Wednesday, March 19 2003, 02:00 am|
Listen up J becaus i am only going to give u this how can i say it....um.... words of wisdom once, how can u find it funny that a girl gets murdered?! And in case u care which u probly don't, who the hell do you think you are if you call a girl a chick and or chicky?! Exactly you are no one to say that! I will be surprised if you have ever had a girl friend let alone get married with the way you act and treat women! Anyways, Seizure great poem!
|Seizure (18.104.22.168) -- Wednesday, March 19 2003, 04:44 am|
Well, I'll be honest... when I saw the comment title, "Offended," I thought to myself I was about to see another Seizure "hater." Glad that wasn't the case :).
|lil (22.214.171.124) -- Thursday, May 15 2003, 11:38 pm|
??didnt like it,but thats life(snip)
|Leah06 (126.96.36.199) -- Friday, May 16 2003, 02:48 am|
Someone is high off question marks!
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