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Untitled
Author: Mary Jensen

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i know i am your friend
i want to be your lover
i know it might sound crazy
but i don't want to find another

the way you touch me
your hands hold me tight
it's like magic when we're making love
all through the night

when your lips kiss mine
they begin to melt
they are the most amazing kisses
i have ever felt

the way you laugh when nothing is funny
it could be a rainy day
but when i'm with you it's always sunny

you know i am your friend
i want you as my lover
i know it might sound crazy
but i promise
you'll never have to find another

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Comments on this poem/writing:

sonia (24.7.174.199) -- Wednesday, October 13 2004, 12:26 am

love it

hi i really like this poem because it my story
B.L.O.K. (65.191.75.120) -- Thursday, May 28 2015, 03:41 pm

hey

Hi this poem has some very strong powerful deep meanings behind it.
"When your lips kiss mine they begin to melt
they are the most amazing kisses I have ever felt"
The passion seems very strong in this stanza.
The next stanza threw me off a bit.

"The way you touch me your hands hold me tight"
The second half of the stanza seemed unfitting in a way. You might want to find something more deeper. You can still use the magic theme but perhaps maybe not even use the word "magic" at all.

"but I promise you'll never have to find another"
is a great finish to the poem however the line above "i know it might sound crazy" should be taken out and replaced with something less unfitting or maybe left blank.
just try these out and see if it looks better.
 
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